Category Archives: BALANCE

Are Women Becoming Millionaires Faster Than Men?

The gender pay gap may be a persisting problem, but there’s at least one piece of good news. According to figures Fidelity Investment shared with the New York Times, women are becoming 401(k) millionaires earlier in life than men. For women, it’s happening around the age of 58.5, while for men, it’s happening closer to 59.3 years old. Furthermore, the number of women who’ve become 401(k) millionaires has doubled in the last 12 years, from 10% to 12%. It’s long been thought that ladies don’t know how to properly handle their money. The growing number of women becoming millionaires says otherwise, though. These findings are based on research Fidelity started back in 2005.

And the 401(k)s are largely responsible for this promising step forward. If you’re not yet familiar, a 401(k) lets an employee take money from their paycheck pre-tax and put it toward a retirement plan. Fidelity also found that women are a little more active when it comes to investing in stocks: while 76% of men invested, 77% of women did.

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Although women, on average, earn less than men, they are contributing more of their pay to their 401(k). This could help explain our success with it. Use your own 401(k) wisely! Up your contributions, and allocate at least enough to get the employer match. This will maximize your earnings.

Way to go, ladies!

Using MDMA for PTSD: What You Need to Know

In a challenging and demanding world, mental health awareness is increasingly imperative to maintain a strong global identity. In fact, 1 in 25 American adults experiences a serious mental illness in any given year that substantially interferes with his or her daily life. With more than 200 classified forms of mental illness, the most common being clinical depression and anxiety disorders, there’s a clear need for further research, treatment and destigmatization to help those struggling. Anxiety disorders, such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), affect more than 18 percent of Americans every year, and lack of proper treatment forces many into desperate situations. PTSD develops in individuals who have survived a shocking or terrifying event, although not everyone who experiences terror will develop the illness. Common triggers include war, assault, childhood trauma, car accidents, and other frightening situations. Common symptoms are flashbacks, nightmares, avoidance, and negative mood changes. While current treatment for PTSD is a combination of talk therapy and medication, the Food and Drug Administration’s most recent breakthrough treatment designation includes the use of low dose MDMA in patients not responding to traditional medication. The drug is most commonly known as the main component in “Molly” and “Ecstasy,” but these street drugs often involve other, more harmful chemical additions. The Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies (MAPS) recently held a government-approved clinical trial that suggests MDMA offers significant help for those suffering from anxiety disorders such as PTSD. The study leaves a lot to unpack, but here are the basics.

 

What is MDMA-assisted psychotherapy?

The combination of low doses of MDMA alongside regular talk therapy. The goal is to allow the euphoric elements of the drug to help catalyze the therapeutic process and confront harmful thoughts and memories.

 

How does it treat PTSD?

The drug is a synthetic compound that decreases fear and defensiveness in patients, while increasing trust, allowing those struggling with severe anxiety to cope during periods of terror. It also increases the release of oxytocin and prolactin, chemicals that encourage feelings of relaxation and peace, fostering a candid discussion of frightening memories with a therapist. In essence, patients who were administered the MDMA felt more confident working through their fears than those given a placebo.

 

How helpful is it?

According to the most recent study, very helpful. Patients were given doses of MDMA during two eight-hour sessions three to five weeks apart, along with weekly non-psychotherapy sessions. The results showed that 80 percent were no longer diagnosed with PTSD after two months. Among the 780 human subjects administered the drug, only one had adverse effects. All other subjects reported at least some benefit from the study, with little to no negative cognitive effects.

 

What are the risks?

The use of MDMA alongside therapy is relatively new, and although it’s considered a breakthrough treatment by the FDA, there are always risks when perfecting new treatments. MDMA as a recreational drug is considered addictive and known to induce paranoia, memory problems, and more serious adverse effects in higher doses. MDMA is considered an illegal controlled substance under U.S. law.

 

Will I have access to this treatment?

The treatment has yet to be streamlined, but some alternative therapists have been known to use it. Because of the drug’s recreational stigma, there could be potential blocks on the road to mainstream use. MAPS is working to make the treatment available to those struggling as soon as possible.

This Couple Has Been Married for 75 Years — Here’s Their Advice

Relationships are a lot of work — you’ve heard it a million times before. Divorce rates may be high, but true love lasts a lifetime. Just ask this adorable couple: John and Evie. They’ve been married for more than 70 years, so they know a thing or two. In this heartwarming video, they share their advice for a long lasting marriage. Let’s be honest: these two are major #relationshipgoals.

It’s sounds so simple and logical, but it’s solid advice so many of us forget when our relationships start to get challenging — as they inevitably will. When it comes down to it, putting your partner’s happiness right up there next to your own is nonnegotiable. You can never stop caring about each other, making each other smile, and enriching each other’s lives.

Which piece of advice resonates most with you?

 

Main image: BeerTastingChampion – Danni Munro/YouTube

6 Seriously Funny Books You Need to Read Right Now

Don’t judge a book by its cover: judge it by its title! From unicorns with attitude to gnome uprisings, these six laugh-out-loud books will have you binge-reading until you’re laughing, crying, and maybe even propping your eyes open with toothpicks—Tom & Jerry-style.

 

Bossypants

Before Liz Lemon (the image of modern womanhood) uttered the “fake curse words” jagweed, blerg, and shark farts, before Tina Fey dug into a sheet cake and Donald Trump on the Weekend Update, before she parodied Sarah Palin on Saturday Night Live, making it and America great again, the Queen of Comedy was a “Debbie Downer” with a dream: one where an “obedient white girl from the suburbs” could “say, yes, and….figure it out afterwards.”  From her work crush on Alec Baldwin to her completely sarcastic beauty tips (Our favorite? “Always remember the most important rule of beauty, which is: who cares?”), Fey’s Bossypants will rock your 30-somethings. Whether you’re killing time on a 90-minute subway ride or sinking a good six inches into your sofa, it’ll have you laughing, and possibly snorting, so loudly that people will beg you to flip through it somewhere else. And, as if that wasn’t enough, when its cover is spread-eagle, your top-half will be morphed into a freakish hybrid—a pretty woman with big, burly, hairy man arms.

 

Are You There, Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea

are you there vodka chelsea handlerIf you had Judy Blume’s Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret on your night stand as a teenager or you just started changing, “We must. We must. We must increase our bust!”, you’ll get a kick out of Chelsea Handler’s parody title Are You There, Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea. The perfect marriage of quick wit, self-mockery, and no doubt some hyperbole, the comedian mines her past for “oh, no you didn’t!” stories that’ll have you spewing laughter bombs. From pretending to honeymoon with her father in order to upgrade to first class to her “horizontal” antics, Handler’s irreverent and offensive turns of phrase don’t just cross the line. They completely erase it.  If you don’t get offended easily, take this quick read with you on your next flight—where appealing to the “higher power” of vodka is optional.

 

Knitting with Dog Hair: Better a Sweater From a Dog You Know and Love Than From a Sheep You’ll Never Meet

knitting with dog hairSharpen your knitting needles, ladies, and get ready to pet your yarn yields.  Kendall Crolius’ how-to book, Knitting With Dog Hair, will teach you how to make caps from your collies, mittens from your malamutes, and scarves from your Scottish terriers. Feline fanatics, there’s no need to be sourpusses because there’s also a section on cat hair. A free, environmentally-friendly spin on an old craft, this author’s crochets are a creative solution to every animal owner’s most vexing problem: shedding, shedding, and more shedding.  If you’re done wearing the scratchy wool sweaters from “sheep that you’ll never meet”, learn to collect, clean, spin, and store your pet’s fur. Surprisingly, though, it’s not a new practice, says Science Magazine. The Coast Salish, Native Americans from northern Washington and southern British Columbia, recycled Rover’s hair into non-ceremonial blankets until the early 1900s.

 

Unicorns are Jerks: a Coloring Book Exposing the Cold, Hard, Sparkly Truth

unicorns are jerksIf you believe that unicorns are made of sugar, spice, and everything nice and that they inhale rainbows, exhale sparkles, and purify poisons, we’ve got bad news: some unicorns can be a real horn in your side. Sure, unicorns think that they’re cool beans because they’re mysterious, beautiful, and mystical, but Theo Nicole Lorenz, the author of Unicorns Are Jerks, knows that they can be anti-social, mythological narcissists. The cartoonist caught them texting in theaters, nabbing leftovers from refrigerators, and even farting in elevators.  Of course, Theo had to sketch the pictures—the unicorns refused to sign photo release forms. But, now that you’ve learned the cold, hard, sparkly truth, you should color it with a set of sparkly markers.  That’s right. Show those jerky unicorns who’s the boss.

 

50 Shades of Chicken

fifty shades of chickenPull out the twine. Whip open the oven. And get ready to dominate dinner. F.L. Fowler’s 50 Shades of Chicken is the “love” story between a young, innocent, free-range chicken and a wealthy, sexy, and very, very hungry chef. A spoof of  EL James’ 50 Shades of Grey, it features three acts: “The Novice Bird” (easy recipes for roasters), “Falling to Pieces” (parts perfect for weeknight meals), and “Advanced Techniques” (the climax of cooking).  From jerking to stuffing to oiling: this pun-o-graphic cookbook is fully loaded with five-star recipes: Dripping Thighs, Bacon-Bound Wings, Learning-to-Truss-You Chicken, and Mustard-Spanked Chicken. 50 Shades of Chicken isn’t just a great gag-gift (pun intended), it’ll bring your date night to a simmer with its mix of laugh-out-loud text and revealing photographs—that’ll change the way you view garlic bulbs and olive oil forever.

 

How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack: Defend Yourself When the Lawn Warriors Strike (and They Will)

how to survive a garden gnome attackMove over adolescent vampires and flesh-eating zombies, there’s a new threat in town: garden gnomes. Standing a little over 12 inches tall, these flowerbed-dwellers are crafty sociopaths bent on murder and mayhem! So, if you ever spot pointy-hatted perps in your garden, dig up Chuck Sambuchino’s How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack, a 106-page guide with laugh-out-loud tips and knee-slapping photos.  From hiding a second “escape” bicycle to locking down your garden tools to creating a miniature moat around your house, whether you love gnomes or hate them, this coffee table-sized book might just save your life—or at least tea time.

The Starbucks Red Holiday Cup is Here

The smell of pine. Twinkling lights. The Starbucks red holiday cup — just three things that are symbolic of the holiday season. And the last of the three has officially made its yearly appearance. Starting today, Sbux revealed their 2017 edition of the red holiday cup. It features two hands coming together in the shape of a heart, which has been left blank for you to write the name of someone special. Nothing says, “I love you,” like having your name written on a coffee cup! Once you’ve filled in your heart, Starbucks says you should share it on social media with the hashtag #GiveGood. Why not invite other people to share in your joy?

The Meaning Behind This Year’s Starbucks Cup

Says Leanne Fremar, Starbucks’ executive creative director, “The holidays are about remembering what it means to give love and put goodness out into the world. We loved the idea of celebrating the good in each other this holiday season.” Well said, Leanne. The world could use more of this.

starbucks red holiday cup
Starbucks

The illustration was created by Jordan Kay of Starbucks Creative Studio, who also created this year’s first-ever color-in holiday cup. Kay said of this new release, “The design symbolizes the love and warmth felt during the holiday season, when we connect with friends and family.” The cup is about more than having something that’s pretty to look at to sip your beverage out of. It’s about celebrating the spirit of the season, and the people around you who help make it so special and full of love.

This year, when you grab your caffeine fix, don’t forget to fill in the heart of the Starbucks red holiday cup with the name of someone important to you — a parent, a significant other, your dog Fluffy. There’s never been a better time to drink delicious coffee. Happy Holidays!

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle Officially Announce Engagement

It’s official: Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are engaged to be married, and the newlyweds-to-be are practically glowing. Even Kensington Palace has confirmed the news.

We don’t know for sure when the handsome prince popped the question, although rumors say it was earlier this month. What we do know is that the ring is simply gorgeous. It features a gold band with three stones. The center stone reportedly came from Botswana, where Prince Harry and Markle visited this summer to celebrate her birthday (and also where the prince has traveled to since he was a child). According to some sources, the two outside diamonds come from the late Princess Diana’s personal collection – a touching tribute to a beautiful woman.

The big day will supposedly happen spring of next year. Beyond Words is patiently waiting for an invitation.


Aside from sharing how happy they were and how romantic the proposal, the couple wouldn’t yet reveal more details when asked. Prince Harry told reporters that he knew Markle was the one the first time he laid eyes on her, and we’re all melting. MELTING.


Congratulations to these two lovebirds; and don’t worry — we’re already planning what to wear to your wedding. Cheers!

Main image: The Kit/Facebook

5 Holiday Movies on Netflix to Get You in the Spirit

December is here, and we’re ready to get in the spirit of the season; but sometimes, life’s many responsibilities stop you from feeling the Christmas cheer. Thankfully, Netflix is here to save the day. Crack open a bottle of wine, grab your favorite Christmas snack, and cozy up in your ugly Christmas sweater for some quality TV time. Here are some of the holiday movies on Netflix that you won’t want to miss.

1. How the Grinch Stole Christmas

Does this movie ever get old? No. The correct answer is no. Jim Carrey gives a memorable performance in a flick that will touch your heart and make you laugh until you cry — whether you’re a wee one or a grown adult.

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2. Bad Santa

Starring Billy Bob Thornton (who surprised me with how hilarious he is), this one’s about a conman and his partner who plot to rob department stores on the eve of Christmas. As you can probably guess, things don’t go according to plans. Don’t let this movie fool you: it’s intended for a mature audience.

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3. Happy Christmas

If cuffing season has you feeling down, you need to see this comedy-drama about a gal named Jenny (played by Anna Kendrick) who, after a break-up, moves in with her brother and his family — and shakes up their home life as a result.

4. A Christmas Prince

A reporter goes undercover for a story on a wild prince, and ends up in a messy situation when she falls in love. Scandal! Betrayal! Lies! Nah, just a really good Christmas movie.

5. The Nightmare Before Christmas

Alright, alright. We know this is largely a Halloween movie; but it’s still about Christmas! And honestly, who’s gotten sick of watching Jack Skellington try to bring Christmas to his home? Not this gal here.

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Main image: Motion Picture Corporation of America

5 Inspiring Books to Give This Holiday Season

We love books. We love reading them, collecting them and, above all, giving them as gifts. Since the holiday season is a time for reflection and resolutions, we’ve gathered our top inspiring books from thinkers, present and past, to jumpstart creativity and connection in the coming year.

 

Brave Enough

by Cheryl Strayed

Brave Enough

Released in October, this little canvas-bound book compiles some of the most provocative and beloved quotes from Cheryl Strayed. Drawn from her wildly successful books Wild, Torch and Tiny Beautiful Things, the quotes appear formatted one per page without attribution. Together, there are 160 pages to dip into when you need a little push of inspiration, encouragement or bravery, including this one: “Believe in the integrity and value of the jagged path. We don’t always do the right thing on our way to rightness.”

 

 

The Little Prince

by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Little Prince

As Antoine de Saint-Exupéry himself put it, The Little Prince is a book for children written for grown-ups. This classic French novella tells the story of an aviator who crashes into the desert. There, he meets a young boy, “the little prince,” who tells him tales of his unusual and otherworldly life in outer space. Each allegory illuminates an aspect of human nature and our collective potential. The accompanying watercolor illustrations are beautiful in their own right.

 

 

 

The War of Art

by Steven Pressfield

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Though we generally shy away from any books with “self” or “help” in the genre description, we’re making an exception for this energetic manifesto geared toward writers. Written in 2002, The War of Art is a straight-talking book about fighting the inner resistance that keeps us from achieving our goals, whether it’s writing a book, starting a diet or founding a company. Pressfield asks, “Are you paralyzed with fear? That’s a good sign. Fear is good. Like self-doubt, fear is an indicator. Fear tells us what we have to do. Remember one rule of thumb: the more scared we are of a work or calling, the more sure we can be that we have to do it.”

 

 

Letters to a Young Poet

by Rainer Maria Rilke

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It’s the correspondence that has inspired millions. Over the course of 10 beautifully written letters, Austrian poet, Rainer Maria Rilke, gives advice to an aspiring writer enrolled at his alma mater. Not only do these letters offer insight into the author’s own poetry, but they provide gems of wisdom and strength for anyone, poet or otherwise. He writes, “If you will stay close to nature, to its simplicity, to the small things hardly noticeable, those things can unexpectedly become great and immeasurable.”

 

 

 

The Year of Magical Thinking

by Joan Didion

inspiring books

Death is part of life. Life is part of death. In recent years, no one has written about these truths as movingly as Joan Didion. The Year of Magical Thinking is a memoir of mourning, but it is also a memoir of surviving. Didion wrote the book following the death of her husband, John Gregory Dunne, while they were both dealing with the hospitalization of their daughter. Didion frankly describes her “magical thinking” and the difficulty she had grappling with the enormity of her grief. Whether you’ve experienced the death of someone close to you or not, Didion’s simple and elegant prose will inspire you to look at your relationship with your emotions and the ones you love.

Helping Without Harming: How to Be a Good Voluntourist

Say what you want about my generation, but millennials are some of the most generous people around. We want to help—we were born into a globalized world, and when we see our fellow woman and man overseas living in poverty or indignity, we’re overcome with the need to do something about it.

It’s that same global curiosity that tickles our itchy feet and flings us off into every corner of the world to study, work, and play way more than our parents did. When you mix our wanderlust with a generational desire to fix the world, you get voluntourism, a global trend whose name sounds like our two favorite things wrapped up in one neat package. But in this case, the whole can be less than the sum of its parts. If not carried out thoughtfully, voluntourism can do much more harm than good. Here are some things you should know about voluntourism and ethical volunteering.

Work to Empower, Not to Save

Sustainability is more than a tree-hugging buzzword: It should be the goal of absolutely every volunteer effort, because its absence usually leaves a community worse off than it was. The number one goal of any good volunteer project is capacity building: empowering communities to address their own needs by sharing expertise and effecting systemic changes.

Image via Pixabay under license CC0
Image via Pixabay under license CC0

Flying into Burkina Faso to help distribute purified drinking water definitely keeps a few people healthy for a day; but if you’re not there tomorrow, they’re going right back to the polluted well they were using before. Volunteer projects like this don’t address real systemic problems like water insecurity.

When projects like these are carried out by two-week tourists instead of vetted international organizations working with local governments, they run the risk of disrupting the local purified water industry. This can lead to industries collapsing from lack of demand, putting more people out of work and leaving them totally dependent on foreign aid organizations for clean drinking water.

Image via Pixabay under license CC0
Image via Pixabay under license CC0

But a volunteer project working with local universities and government organizations to produce affordable water purifiers, improve the city water treatment system, or provide financing and support for water technology startups has the total opposite effect. These kinds of projects empower local people to take control of their own drinking water and determine for themselves what kinds of initiatives will serve their communities best.

Image via Pixabay under license CC0
Image via Pixabay under license CC0

Even if you don’t know the first thing about water sanitation, you can still help out with great projects like these. Volunteering to help with social media awareness-spreading or fundraising for an organization like PureMadi, which works with the University of Venda in South Africa to produce sustainable water purifying technology, may not seem as sexy as personally handing out drinking water to the thirsty, but it gives you a chance to help permanently quench a community’s thirst.

water purification puremadi
Image courtesy of PureMadi

Are You Really Qualified to be Doing That?

There are broadly two kinds of volunteer roles we can serve in: skilled jobs and unskilled ones. Both carry important ethical concerns that you should consider before ever booking your trip.

Providing tuberculosis vaccinations in Uganda or teaching computer skills in a rural Nicaraguan school are fantastic ways of facilitating social change, but only if you’re actually qualified to do them. Skilled labor like this requires a particular kind of education and experience. If the extent of your medical experience is your two semesters of college bio classes, the fact that your passport comes from a country with fantastic hospitals doesn’t qualify you to be a doctor or a nurse in a developing country.

doctor helps children in africa
© Francovolpato | Dreamstime.comA Volunteer Female Doctor Visit An African Child Photo

On the other hand, unskilled labor is something most people can do with little training or technical knowledge. Be skeptical of simple construction, clean-up, or other manual labor projects: If anyone can do it, why do they need you? Are you a more talented trash-picker-upper than your neighbors in Haiti? In participating in these kinds of projects, you’ll usually be squashing employment opportunities for locals who could support their families with jobs like these.

If you’re still building your professional skills, look to programs that offer training tailored to the communities in which they work. WorldTeach, for example, offers year-long teaching placements that include initial and ongoing pedagogical training and support tailored to the needs and requests of the communities they work with.

woman teaching students
Image via Pixabay under license CC0

If you’re not ready to invest in a professional skill just yet, try offering some sustainable unskilled help. Voluntourism organizations like All Hands Volunteers let local governments and NGOs take the lead, and carefully screen incoming volunteers for sustainable long-term reconstruction projects after natural disasters. 

Don’t Be a “Poverty Pornographer”

Not objectifying people is about more than just not hurting someone’s feelings: Images of poverty and people in suffering have the power to either humanize and spread awareness and empathy or to dehumanize and promote debilitating stereotypes.

canon camera
Image via Pixabay under license CC0

It’s incredibly important to remember and be actively cognizant of the fact that the people you are helping are human beings first, and poor or disadvantaged second. Most people around the world daydream, laugh at good jokes, love their mothers, get frustrated with their homework, feel lonely at times, and aspire to be able to care for themselves, just like their neighbors in developed countries.

family laugh bali
Image via Pixabay under license CC0

Poverty porn is the use of images of poor people and poverty to encourage us to make a donation or otherwise use our superior position to “save” them. The problems with this approach are many: Not only is it literally using people to generate income for a foreign aid organization, but it also perpetuates the dangerous myth of the helpless poor person whose only hope lies in the charity of an empowered white Westerner.

Look for organizations whose imagery depict humans in dignified, human situations and in poses and settings that you wouldn’t mind being photographed in if you were in their place. It’s no coincidence that high-impact organizations like Cordaid also have excellent track records of using imagery that presents the people they work with as dignified human equals.

In 2016, if you’ve got a desire and an internet connection, you can help. There’s absolutely zero wrong with combining some volunteer work with your summer backpacking trip, or with picking a volunteer project that will boost your own professional or personal growth, as long as you do your research and ask yourself the right questions about your plans regarding voluntourism.

Image via Pixabay under license CC0
Image via Pixabay under license CC0

Whatever you do, don’t let bad voluntourist projects turn you off from volunteering altogether. Voluntourism exists because there’s a lot of good to be done in the world and, refreshingly, a lot of people out there who want to do it. If you’re one of those people, go out and see the world; and while you’re out there, make a thoughtful choice about how you can change it for the better.

The Best Black Friday Deals

Are you going to layer on your warmest winter clothes and brave the Black Friday crowds? I applaud you. I’ll be shopping from the safety of my home office, drinking coffee and generally avoiding everybody. Either way, if you want to get your hands on some of the best Black Friday deals, snaps for you for being a savvy budget-shopper. Do you know where to find the best discounts? Because we’ve got ’em.

Even the toughest Black Friday shopper shouldn’t hit the stores or scan the interwebs without a plan in place. Instead of aimlessly wandering from door to door or web page to web page, know ahead of time where you’ll find the best holiday discounts. According to Forbes, these are some of the retailers offering the best Black Friday deals, and the markdowns they’re offering.

  1. Kohl’s — 66.3%
  2. JCPenney — 66.3%
  3. Belk — 62.8%
  4. Stage — 60.8%
  5. Shopko — 55.9%
  6. Bealls Florida — 52.8%
  7. Sears — 50.1%
  8. Macy’s — 45.6%
  9. Fred Meyer — 43.9%
  10. AAFES — 37.3%
  11. All retailers — 37.1%

WalletHub listed many of the same, and also included several more of their own.

  1. Fred Meyer — 43.9%
  2. Amazon — 36.8%
  3. Target — 36.2%
  4. Kmart — 35.8%
  5. Walmart — 34.2%
  6. Best Buy — 30%

See their full list here — there’s plenty to choose from. Whether you’re looking for electronics, toys, office supplies, or something else entirely, odds are there’s a retailer somewhere offering serious discounts, which means you save major cash.

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Last year, shoppers spent a whopping $682 billion on Black Friday. Expect long lines out the door; and if you’re one of those people who camps outside the night before, well, bring snacks. This day is not for the faint of heart. If you plan on visiting stores in person, please shop responsibly, don’t push any grandmas, and always say “please” and “thank you.” Enjoy the markdowns, friends. Happy Black Friday!

best black friday deals