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Why Putting Your Own Needs First is Not Selfish

From the moment you took your first steps, your parents taught you one thing: put others’ needs before you own. Should you stray from this path, you are the actual embodiment of self-absorption. You probably believed it, too. And yet, putting your own needs first isn’t always the selfish act it’s made out to be. Instead, it’s often a highly necessary one.

The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a F**k author Sarah Knight calls this notion “affixing your own oxygen mask before helping others.” It’s a fitting metaphor. You take care of yourself before you can even think about looking after those around you. If you give all that you have to anyone who asks for it, it won’t be long until you burn out. At that point, you’re no use to anybody – least of all yourself. 

Things you can (and maybe should) say “no” to

So, when should you say “no” and why should you do it? While declining every single request you get is a tad over the top, there are certain times when people will ask too much of you. Not sure what I’m talking about? Here are three classic examples. 

1. Attending an expensive bachelorette party abroad

“Ladies! As you know, me and Brad are engaged! So, I’d like to formallyinvite you all to my bachelorette party (woo!). Details TBC but I’m thinking a quick weekend trip to Paris. I’m just spitballing, so let me know what you think!” 

Sound familiar? When your friends start to get engaged, your inbox is sure to be flooded with messages closely resembling this one. There’s no rule that says you have to spend hundreds of dollars flying halfway around the world for your friend. 

There are two main things that you should consider. First of all, can you afford the time and money the trip will take? If the answer is no, it’s time to politely decline. Secondly, do you actually want to go? Again, if the answer is no, you need to say so. You have no obligation. Sure, if the bride-to-be is your best friend and you wantto go, you should do it. But if there’s the slightest part of you that wants to say no, listen to your gut. 

2. Extra workplace tasks (pay raise not included)

Has your job role expanded over the years? As you get more comfortable in a position, it’s only natural that it may change and that you could gain more responsibilities. If your plate is getting fuller but your bank balance remains the same, this could be a real problem. No matter how your boss tries to sugarcoat this pill, the facts remain the same. You’re doing extra workplace chores and reaping absolutely no financial rewards. That’s not okay.

3. Spending the holidays with your in-laws

You don’t just marry a person – you marry their entire family. Yes, whether you’re a newly-wed or anyone in an LTR, you will know this phrase to be true. Navigating the holiday period can be a particularly tricky task, especially if your partner wants you to spend it with their family. Saying “no” and spending the season with your family instead may seem like a tough decision, but it’s one that you’re 100% entitled to make.

Talking openly to your partner about what each of you is planning to do is the best way forward. Setting out your stall and refusing to head to the in-laws is all very well, but you have to be prepared for your partner to go anyhow. It might mean spending the holidays apart or coming up with a handy compromise. Either way, you should be as clear as possible about what you want and why you want it. 

 How To Say ‘No’ to Just About Anything 

For many of us, it’s not just deciding we don’t want to do something that’s the problem. It’s literally saying “no” to people. This is especially hard if it’s someone you love, care about, and want to please. Still, sometimes you need to put your needs first and make it clear that you can’t do what they’ve asked of you. You don’t have to be rude or obnoxious about it. Instead, it’s all about choosing your words wisely. 

While you may be tempted to pussyfoot around the topics, being direct is a much quicker solution. One study published in the Journal of Consumer Research found that using the phrase “I don’t” rather than “I can’t” could be the key to getting this right. Saying that you can’t do something gives the impression that the situation is out of your hands, which makes you sound flaky, as though you’re making up excuses. Because, well, you are. 

On the other hand, saying that you don’t want to, don’t have the time to, or don’t have the money to makes it clear that you’ve set a boundary. You’ve thought about the request and decided that you don’t have the right resources to do it. It’s hard to argue with that kind of logic and, as you will find, few people will try to. What’s more, they are likely to respect your stance as it shows confidence in yourself and what you can and can’t commit to. Nice work. 

Are you guilty of people-pleasing and giving too much? Learning to say “no” to things and putting your own needs first is a much-needed remedy. That doesn’t mean being contrary for the sake of it. It means having the confidence and self-respect to set your own limits on your own terms. After all, it’s your life and you make the rules. Realizing that and making this small change will make you stronger and, let’s be real here, happier, too.

5 Stylish and Affordable Home Decor Sites

Home is where the heart all of your favorite furniture and decor is. But finding the best buys can be a daunting task. We’ve rounded up five of the best furniture and home decor sites. Stop scouring hundreds of random pages and start looking through these sites for pieces that won’t break the bank and still look like home sweet home.

All Modern

All Modern is a site that sells thousands of items like furniture, decor, pillows, rugs, lighting, bedding, bath decorations, renovation materials, outdoor designs, and more. They offer free shipping over $49 and frequently have sales on their already inexpensive items. The website is easy to navigate, and categories are broken up into smaller subcategories, making it simple for you to find everything you need. All Modern has a sale tab so you can easily browse all of the best prices.

West Elm


West Elm is probably the most popular site on this list. The owners of West Elm also own Pottery Barn, Williams Sonoma, Rejuvenation, and Mark and Graham. But West Elm is definitely the most affordable under that umbrella. Similar to All Modern, West Elm is organized by categories, including furniture, rugs and windows, bedding, lighting, pillows and decor, wall art and mirrors, tabletop, outdoor, and gifts. If you’re not into online shopping (no judgment), West Elm has stores all over the United States, and also in Canada, Australia, Korea, Mexico, the Middle East, Philippines, and the United Kingdom. Pretty cool, right?

Dwell


Dwell is the perfect one-stop shop for everything home related. Dwell offers photo inspiration of home design ideas, blog posts covering cool homes all over the world, and a section where you can follow and contact architects, artists, and contractors. Dwell also has an advice tab where you can submit a question to the community to answer for you. Lastly, you can browse anything from furniture and decor to fashion and travel items. If you’re like us and can’t get enough of Dwell, you can subscribe to their magazine that has six issues available per year in print and digital copies.

Joss and Main


Joss and Main has everything you need to style every last inch of your home. Find inspiration through images and blog posts that have been uploaded onto the site. Once you’ve been inspired to your heart’s content, you can create an account and make your own idea boards, where you can organize all of your ideas, inspiration, and your wish list. They also have a room planner tool where you can design your very own dream room virtually. 

Wayfair


Wayfair is the sister website of Joss and Main. With thousands of furniture and home decor options, you’re bound to find something you love. What sets Wayfair apart is they offer free shipping for orders over $49 dollars, they have frequent sales where you can save up to 70%, and they even have their own credit card you can apply for and use to save $40 on your first order. With so many pieces on the website, it can get kind of overwhelming. Luckily, Wayfair has an option to search everything on the site that falls under specific styles of decorating like rustic, coastal, modern, country/cottage, and glam. Refine your search and only view items that best suit your style.

Still Shopping for Holiday Gifts? How About This $45,000 Faberge Egg Pendant?

Doing your holiday shopping on a budget? Sorry, can’t help you there. But if you’ve got several tens of thousands of dollars to spare, how about this $45,000 Faberge egg pendant? Faberge released the Mosaic Multi-coloured Pendant, featuring princess cut sapphires, rubies, tsavorites, and white diamonds — all set in yellow gold. I know you’re wondering, and yes, the price includes shipping and insurance for delivery.

While most of us won’t be getting this gorgeous piece from Santa anytime soon (or… ever), it’s still fun to dream. This isn’t your average necklace, clearly, and can even be worn multiple ways. For instance, you can flip it around and wear it in the back, as pictured below.

Wouldn’t that look lovely will your favorite low-back dress?

Even though the price tag is giving me anxiety, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t find it beautiful. And while others certainly agree, some are simply curious.


What do you think of this Faberge egg? If you’re still shopping for friends and family and need creative gift ideas, visit Beyond Words for inspiration.

Main image: Faberge

This Homeless Man Used His Last $20 to Help a Stranded Woman

Johnny Bobbitt Jr. You’ll never forget this name. One night, a young woman named Kate McClure ran out of gas at night on Interstate 95 in Pennsylvania. Bobbitt, a 34-year-old homeless man, saw her and approached her car – but he had no intention of asking her for money. He told her to stay in her car with the doors locked, and he left. When he returned a few minutes later, he had a gas can with him. Johnny Bobbitt Jr. had spent his last $20 to help McClure fill her tank and safely get home.

McClure did her best to pay him back, even though he never asked for a dime. She kept stopping by the place his sits with money, gift cards, water, and warm clothes. But she wanted to do more. So McClure created a GoFundMe page, with the goal of raising $10,000 for Bobbitt. At the time of this article, the campaign has raised nearly $350,000.

McClure says on the GoFundMe page that she wants to raise money for an apartment, car, and expenses for Bobbitt. “He is very interested in finding a job, and I believe that with a place to be able to clean up every night and get a good night’s rest, his life can get back to being normal.” With the money she raised, he’ll be able to afford a lot more than that.

It’s a beautiful story for the holiday season, and a reminder to give back when you can. One man was willing to give up the little bit of money he had to help someone else. His generosity has inspired countless people all around the nation.

 

Main image: Kate McClure/GoFundMe

7 Books about Life-Changing Love

The weather is cooling and fall leaves float in the breeze. The coming of fall signals a time for togetherness and compassion. To help you celebrate love, we’ve compiled a list of books focusing not on romance, but on life-changing love.

 

Kisses from Katie by Katie J. Davis

kisses from katieKatie’s relentless love for her God and others leads her to a life of service in Uganda. At just eighteen years old, Katie foregoes her parents’ college plans and pursues a mission trip to Africa. Katie’s mission trip turns into a lifetime commitment as Katie decides to permanently move to Uganda and adopt fourteen children. In her premier novel, Katie details her life as she takes care of her children and launches Amazima Ministries in order to provide orphans with school, meals and care. Katie’s love story with Uganda is truly inspirational.

 

The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd

secret life of beesLily Owens and her stand in mother, Rosaleen, seek refuge in the home of the beekeeping “calendar sisters” after an altercation with a trio of violent racist. Lily joins Rosaleen in order to escape from her abusive father and haunting memories of her mother’s death.  The two are quickly immersed in the world of beekeeping. Slowly, they discover the truth surrounding the death of Lily’s mother and learn how to love themselves.

 

My Name is Mahtob by Mahtob Mahmoody

my name is mahtobMahtob is the daughter from the novel and movie, Not Without My Daughter. She tells the story of her captivity in Iran from her perspective and continues her story to the present day.  My Name is Mahtob is the story of a mother who loves her daughter too much to leave her behind and too much to teach her to hate.  Because her mother takes special care to keep Mahtob immersed in Iranian culture, Mahtob is able to come to love her father as the man who will forever be a part of her. Through this love, she is able to find forgiveness and peace.

 

Bread and Wine by Shauna Niequist

bread and wine“With love, with love, with love” is the refrain of Niequist’s follow up to Bittersweet and Cold Tangerines. Niequist writes of that deep abiding love we often share around a hearty meal. Bread and Wine is a collection of essays about the love-filled moments in Niequist’s life, including travels around Europe, Sunday afternoons with her family, moving into her own home and her pregnancy. Each essay is followed by a recipe, like blueberry crisp or mango chicken curry, that she felt captured that moment for her. Niequist reminds us to focus not on counting down minutes, but on cherishing moments that take our breath away.

 

Things I Want My Daughters to Know by Elizabeth Noble

things i want my daughters to knowNoble heartbreakingly captures the beauty of mother-daughter love in Things I Want my Daughters to Know. The novel opens at the funeral of Barbara, the mother of four daughters. After being fatally diagnosed with cancer, Barbara wrote a series of letters for each of her daughters to be read after her death. In a beautiful way, Barbara is able to help her daughters heal and move on with their lives, even though she can no longer be physically present.

 

Walk to Beautiful by Jimmy Wayne

walk to beautifulWalk to Beautiful is the true story of Jimmy Wayne’s life. Jimmy spent time in and out of the foster care system, and eventually came to meet Bea and Russell, an older couple who took him under their wings. Their love, coupled with the love and energy of his guidance counselor, is what motivates Jimmy to finish school and pour himself into his music. After reaching the pinnacle of his country music career, Jimmy passes on their love by walking halfway across America in order to raise awareness and support for foster children.

 

Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood by Rebecca Wells

divine secrets of the yaya sisterhoodDivine Secrets is a classic example of the power of a sisterhood. Siddalee‘s mother sends her old scrapbook to Siddalee after she attacks her mother’s parenting ability in a national newspaper. Through her mother’s scrapbook, Siddalee discovers the stories of the women who have been her mother’s lifelong friends, the members of the “Ya-Yas”. Each Ya-Ya comes to life, and Siddalee is able to piece together their personalities, flaws and life events. The scrapbook allows Siddalee to learn life lessons as well as reach the point of forgiving her mother for past transgressions.

 

Thanksgiving Travel Hacks: 3 Detours to Steer Clear of Traffic Jams

It’s that time of year again: The busiest and most backed-up travel day of the year is almost upon us. What’s meant to be a mid-season break full of fall fashion and family time can easily devolve into a stressed-out mess where you expend all your energy crawling one stoplight at a time toward the interstate onramp.

Let’s skip all that this year. Instead, transform your holiday transportation nightmare into a revitalizing Thanksgiving weekend mini-vacation.

Pick somewhere to watch the fall leaves turn colors on your way home or back, inject a dose of mindfulness to shift your mindset from one of fulfilling obligations to one of adventure, and avoid the seasonal crowds with one of these three alternative approaches to Thanksgiving travel.

Coast Home in the Carpool Lane

thanksgiving travel hacks

Creepy anonymous Craigslist rideshares are a thing of the past, one thing you should be thankful for on Thanksgiving. Nowadays there are plenty of apps and websites to choose from that’ll get you there and back safely and affordably, and let you meet other adventurous travelers on the way.

Zimride is one of the most popular rideshare platforms. Whether you use it online or in app form, you’ll log in with Facebook and connect to other drivers and passengers who study at your university, work at your company, or have mutual Facebook friends, removing the anonymity that turns off many would-be carpoolers. Other apps and sites like Hitch-A-Ride and Carpool World will offer a few more options.

Moreover, try to approach the platforms with a sense of adventure. Do you see a friendly-looking driver headed to a cool historic town close enough to home that a short train connection or Mom’s shuttle service can get you the rest of the way? Send her a message and take it from there.

Take a Trans-American Train Trip

thanksgiving travel hacks

What ever happened to traveling by train in the US? You don’t have to go to Europe for a tranquil tour of the countryside, and it’s a great way to add a dose of novelty to your Thanksgiving commute.

Train travel at the start of the holiday season has picked up so much that Amtrak is even offering extra holiday service in the Great Lakes area — good news for Chicago-dwelling yuppies heading back home to the Midwest, Mid-Atlantic, or New England. Whether you live on the East coast, the West coast, or somewhere in between, there’s probably an Amtrak station close to home, and the national train service has quite a few deals to be thankful for this time of year.

Doing some research before booking your itinerary can save you enough money to fit in an extra day trip on your way home or back. Amtrak Smart Fares are available every week, and you can use them to score a 30% discount on tickets booked the week before you leave. Additionally, students, military personnel and families, veterans and more are eligible discounts everyday, be it a holiday weekend or a spontaneous mid-week jaunt.

For more deals, browse by region and find an itinerary that fits your holiday travel plans.

Skip the Checked Baggage, Opt for a Budget Airline

airport baggage

If home is too far for the carpool lane or the train car, it’s time to take advantage of the explosive growth in discount airlines in recent years that have revolutionized air travel in the US.

Frontier, and JetBlue, and Southwest are some of the most popular, and you can board your flight on all three airlines with a free piece of carry-on luggage big enough to get you through the weekend and then some.

Check Fare Compare to see different airlines’ baggage policies, and take an extra minute to check against the individual airline’s website to make sure the policy is up to date.

And if discount sounds too discount for you, there are other smart ways to bypass baggage fees and still fly home and back in style. Just remember, checking a bag will usually mean one more line to wait in on either end of your trip, so spend a little time training yourself in the art of packing light no matter who you fly with this Thanksgiving.

Hair Trends of 2016: The Most Creative Cuts and Colors of the Year

Have you been curious about the different ways that people are wearing their hair lately? It seems like this year, we’ve seen a shift from some safe, classical haircuts and styles to more creative alternatives, including unique coloring. Pushing the limits (even slightly) has become trendy, and we’ve noticed it from everyone between A-list celebs to our next door neighbors, leading to more new takes on old favorites as well as looks that are completely out of the box. Here are a few hair trends of 2016 that have taken over the beauty salons and our communities.

Alternatives to the Classic Bob

Self, Profile
Few styles scream female empowerment more than cutting off long locks, and the bob has been making waves in the sea of beauty since it became a trend in the 1920s. Lately, however, we are seeing fewer cuts that frame the front of the face and taper in the back, and a greater number of longer styles, known as the lob.

Sticking between the chin and shoulders adds a little flexibility for those not quite dedicated to taking the full plunge, like recently seen on Game Of Thrones star Emilia Clarke. Actress Julianne Hough’s slightly wavy bob with light layers is also a great style for anyone wishing shorter hair but looking to test the waters first.

Do you need some extra inspiration? Just look at any recent photo of Taylor Swift. The singer/songwriter has fully embraced the bob, whether shaggy or slicked back.

Bold Bangs

hair trends 2016

Speaking of Taylor Swift, her bold, blunt bangs have received a lot of attention this year. While curly hair is a bit more difficult to work with, this is a hot look for people with straight strands on the medium to thick side. It also fits well with oval and square faces, and may be a desirable look for anyone who is okay with taking a bit more time in the morning to get just the right coif.

Long Layers

This look is adaptable, simple, and beautiful. Layers add volume and style all by themselves, minimizing the need for products and blow drying. They also keep long hair from appearing weighed down. And the best part is that anyone can rock them, especially since they are easily manageable. Over the last few years, we have seen more waves and bounce, especially a focus on curling hair at the ends. It is also popular to brighten layers with highlights and add extra dimension with lowlights.

Are you looking for photos to show your stylist at your next hair appointment? Look for any of Jennifer Aniston, who has made wearing long layers an art form, and some of the Dutchess of Cambridge Kate Middleton.

Ombre

Have you started wondering if your friends are growing out their roots on purpose? Some may appear to wait longer between highlighting appointments; but if the graduation from dark roots to light tips seems too perfect, perhaps they’re really opting for an ombre color. Hair that starts dark and gradually lightens, or visa-verse, has been popular for a few years, especially in the blonde and brown hue ranges.

We are also seeing more extreme dark to bright transitions (or the other way around), especially those incorporating white blonde, reds, and blues.

Unnatural Colors

Priscila Diniz daily fashion inspiration
Easily the most attention-grabbing trend of the year has been unnatural colors, like various metallics and denim blue. Singer Katie Perry has been one of the more adventurous celebrities to experiment with her hair and is a fan of “rainbow color,” including ranges of purple, like lilac.

While there is nothing subtle about unnatural colors, stylists have begun developing ways to make them look more organic, especially playing with softer hues and faint ombres. Then again, you may want to make your splash of color stand out. Dip dye hair (which literally looks like it’s been dipped in color) is a bold look for daring divas.

Tarangire: Tanzania’s Hidden Park for Elephant Lovers

Baobab trees break up the grassy savannah plains before a meandering river turns the ground into swampland. The roar of a lion echoes in the distance, giraffes tower among the trees and elephants toss up sandy earth as their own brand of sunscreen. This is Tarangire National Park. It’s what you unwittingly picture when you think African safari, where animals outnumber people and where you’ll be humbled by the sheer size of our planet and your brief moment of time in it.

A family of African elephants in Tarangire National Park Tanzania on green grass savanna.
A family of African elephants in Tarangire National Park, Tanzania.

A Hidden Gem in Tanzania

Situated in Northern Tanzania, less than three hours from the start of most safaris in Arusha, Tarangire is a hidden gem. The national park isn’t on most people’s safari plans. And those that do make it to Tarangire rarely stay for more than a day, missing out on the majority of the park’s 1100-square miles and the second highest concentration of wildlife in all of Tanzania.  Ask anyone who has spent time exploring the country and they’ll tell you that not only is Tarangire the one park not to miss but you should plan on staying a few days. They’ll tell you to get away from the main gate where most of the lodges are and explore the depths of the park home to lions, more zebras than you can count and a rare African elephant success story. So, this past June I did.

Herd of Gnus, Zebra and Impala in the Tarangire National Park, Tanzania
Herd of Gnus, Zebra and Impala in the Tarangire National Park, Tanzania.

With one of the densest populations of elephants in all of Africa, you’ll find the magnificent animals in Tarangire no matter the season. We hadn’t even been in the park for an hour before we saw our first elephants, splashing in the river, roaming seemingly unworried feet from safari vehicles, greeting each other by their trunks. To see the mischievous, playful creatures in their natural habit is reason alone to come, a feat we soon may not be able to do.

Two young cheetahs with their mother in Tarangire National Park, Tanzania Africa.
Two young cheetahs with their mother in Tarangire National Park, Tanzania Africa.

Tanzania’s elephant population, formerly the second biggest in Africa, dropped from 110,000 in 2009 to less than 44,000 today. That’s a more than 60 percent loss in seven years. Poaching is the main culprit, although the development of areas around the parks also plays a role.  Every 15 minutes an elephant is killed in Africa, 96 a day, 35,000 a year. The poachers leave the carcasses, taking only the tusks to feed the world’s insatiable taste for ivory and using the profits to fund arms-trades, drugs and terrorism.

Baboon - Tarangire National Park - Wildlife Reserve in Tanzania, Africa
Baboons in Tarangire National Park Wildlife Reserve in Tanzania, Africa.

There are rare exceptions, like Tarangire, where the elephant population has grown since the 1980s. Partnerships that have spanned the globe, led by the Wildlife Conservation Society, Tarangire park rangers and the local population, are to thank and are an example of a global solution.

Elephant in Tarangire national park, Tanzania
Elephant in Tarangire national park, Tanzania, Africa.

The elephants munch on grass, an old bull walks to for a drink, a mother keeps an eye on her young while glancing at our safari vehicle and we stay and watch for as long as we can.

Nature at its Finest: 7 Must-See National Parks

“There is a delight in the hardy life of the open. There are no words that can tell the hidden spirit of the wilderness, that can reveal its mystery, its melancholy and its charm,” wrote Teddy Roosevelt famously. He was speaking to the pressing need for land conservation.

Between outings with John Muir, camping trips to Yellowstone National Park, and even some regular presidential duties, Roosevelt spent some of his time while at the helm of the United States during the late 1800s designating five new national parks, 18 national monuments, 51 federal bird sanctuaries, four national game refuges, and roughly 100 million acres of national forest.

Teddy’s gift to the world is this legacy of public land conservation. Almost 150 years later, any one of us can still throw some camping gear in our car, hop a short plane ride, or even take a bus to an expanse of public land that has never been subdivided, developed, or parceled.

In a world that undoubtedly is subdivided, these open spaces have the ability to save us from ourselves.

 

Glacier National Park

Glacier National Park
Stanton and Vaught Reflections 4.23.16, from Glacier National Park on Flickr, NPS photo by Jacob W. Frank

Presenting jagged mountains, snow-capped peaks, and crystal-blue lakes, IRL. Glacier National Park, located in northern Montana, Idaho, and southern Canada, was designated in 1910. However, archaeological evidence suggests human activity in the area dates back 10,000 years, with most recent Native American residencies by the Blackfeet, Salish, and Kootenai Tribes.

glacier national park
Pastel Sunrise over Howe Ridge. from Glacier National Park on Flickr, NPS photo by Jacob W. Frank

Today, the park is known for its incredible views, wildlife, and of course, glaciers. Unfortunately, time may be running out for the latter. Drive, camp, fish, boat…a good time to visit Glacier is spring or fall.

 

Denali National Park and Preserve

caribou in denali national park
Caribou, from Denali National Park and Preserve on Flickr, NPS Photo by Jay Elhard

To those of you who envision snow and eternal darkness: the beauty of Alaska is varied, colorful, and very real. Within its six million acres, everything in Denali seems exaggerated: the size of the mountains, the depth of the lakes, the taste of the berries, the extent of the sunlight hours in early summer.

northern lights denali national park
Northern Lights dance across the sky in early April, from Denali National Park and Preserve on Flickr, NPS Photo by Katie Thoresen

Relative inaccessibility is what makes Denali and the rest of Alaska so desirable. Car travel is restricted within the park — which means wildlife is less desensitized to human activity than elsewhere — and hardcore mountaineers and dog sledders continually challenge each other within the park boundaries and surrounding areas. Visit in summer for endless light.

 

Arches National Park

arches national park
Primitive Park Avenue, from Arches National Park on Flickr, NPS Photo by Kait Thomas

There’s something similarly spiritual and other-worldly about the red rock of the Southwest, which Arches National Park boasts in spades. Nothing makes you feel quite so small as a deep blue desert sky stretched across red rock, sand, and hardy, scrub-like desert plants — save for the gravity-defying sandstone figurines of Arches National Park.

Arches national park
Reflection near Courthouse Towers, from Arches National Park on Flickr (CC BY 2.0), NPS Photo by Casey Hodnett

Visit Arches in early spring in a pair of hiking shoes, or trade them out for some climbing gear. Rock climbing is accepted — nay, encouraged — in this part of the country. Visit as early as possible in the spring, before it gets hot.

 

Yosemite National Park

yosemite national park
Lake Tenaya, Yosemite National Park, from Su—May on Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

What is it about this place? It’s green, yet the cool-toned granite formations rise nearly to the clouds. The redwood Sequoias are world-famous for their size and unique color. It feels almost esoteric.

Lake Tenaya, Yosemite National Park, California
Lake Tenaya, Yosemite National Park, California

Aside from its long history of use by Native American tribes, the park was designated as a protected public land in 1890, a victory of efforts credited to John Muir and his attempt to prevent continued exploitation.

yosemite falls national park
Prism at Yosemite Falls, from NRG_Crisis on Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

Recreation in Yosemite focuses around touring, hiking, and wildlife observation, while boasting a host of vendors eager to facilitate more sporting adventures along the lines of climbing, fishing, biking, horseback riding, and more. Visit year-round.

 

Acadia National Park

acadia national park bridge
Cobblestone Bridge, Acadia National Park, from Andy Smith on Flickr (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0)

There’s beauty in the Eastern United States, too — in abundance. The first Eastern National Park, Acadia, was designated exactly 100 years ago in 1916. Located on Maine’s Atlantic coast, this park is all about the ocean. Its history is East-Coast length — that is to say, dating back thousands of years until it was discovered in the early 1600s by a French explorer, Samuel De Champlain.

acadia national park
Schoodic Peninsula, from Criana on Flickr (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0)

Plan a tour, hop a boat, ride a bike, or enjoy the amenities of Bar Harbor — but summer is the time to go.

 

Big Bend National Park

big bend national park
Sunset over the Rio Grande, from Alison I. on Flickr (CC BY-ND 2.0)

Oh, Tejas. The paired-down splendor of Big Bend’s rock formations, stubby plants, and dramatic sunsets brings to mind old Westerns; but its portrayal in American literature is unfortunately too limited by the 150-year-old knowledge of the park available to English speakers to capture the area’s true complexity. Predominantly Native Americans — and later, Spanish looking for gold — are the most acquainted with the Big Bend, historically speaking. But today, the park serves as 118 miles of the US-Mexico border.

big bend national park
Trail through the canyon
(Santa Elena Canyon @ Big Bend National Park, Texas), from Daveynin on Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

Visit in spring; wear hiking shoes and light colors.

 

Everglades National Park

everglades national park
From Daniel Hartwig on Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

Swamps, crocodiles, and…subtropical wilderness? The predominate reputation extending from Everglades National Park doesn’t do its complex ecosystem justice. Its intricate network of ponds, sloughs, and marshes is symptomatic of a large sheet of slow-moving water, one whose fertility was systematically taken advantage of for agricultural purposes until 1947, when it was designated a protected land.

everglades national park
Everglades National Park Nine Mile Pond Canoe Trail, from Miguel Vieira on Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

Birding is a huge draw to the Everglades, as is the opportunity for a plethora of typical recreational pastimes such as a boating, hiking, and camping. Visit during the dry period, roughly December through April.

Travel This Summer to These Top American Ballparks

The crack of the bat, the smell of popcorn in the air, an organ playing outdoors on a bright and sunny day – this is America in the summertime at the great ballparks of the USA.

Classic American ballparks are destinations all to themselves; but when combined with classic American cities, they make for ideal summer travel destinations. Combining a ballgame with seeing the sights of a city provides a rewarding experience for everyone from families to couples to fun-seeking singles.

Nearly every major city has a major league stadium, but some are better destinations than others. This article focuses on five places – two of the most historic venues in the sport, and three others where there’s a lively combination of baseball and social activities.

 

WRIGLEY FIELD (CHICAGO CUBS)

wrigley field

Going to Wrigley Field is more than going to see a game. It’s an experience. 

That’s because Wrigley Field is America’s second-oldest ballpark, one of the few originals remaining from when stadiums were built around existing neighborhoods, rather than tearing down everything around it, as is the modern American approach to sports venue construction. This means it has history and tradition that simply can’t be matched by its modern counterparts.

As a result, Wrigley Field is a part of the community, like the friendly old lady down the street who always gives out the best candy to the kids at Halloween. Here, you don’t just show up, walk through the gate and go to your seats. You have to do the Wrigley “routine.”

First, you take the “L” train to the ballpark. Then you go to Murphy’s Bleachers, one of the many bars in the surrounding neighborhood of Wrigleyville. It is here that you meet and mingle with true Cubs fans. Tell them this is your first time to Wrigley Field and they will quickly engage you in conversation and tell stories about their experiences at the ballpark.

Old Style, the official beer of the Cubs | Photo: via Morguefile under the Morguefile License
Old Style, the official beer of the Cubs | Photo: dharder via Morguefile under the Morguefile License

Then you go into the stadium, which is like stepping back in time. This is what baseball must have been like in the 1920s. If you’re down low, the players are so close, you can practically reach out and touch them. An oompha band walks through the aisles playing music. Vendors cruise around selling Chicago’s own Old Style beer.

The outfield wall is covered in ivy and it’s not uncommon for a ball to get stuck in it; it’s rather comical to see the outfielder trying to pry the ball out of the green leaves. If the wind is blowing out, then you’re in for a real treat – lots of home runs will be hit and a final score of 24-22 is not unprecedented at Wrigley. If the other team hits a home run and it lands in the bleachers, the fans will throw the ball back into the outfield in a top Wrigley Field tradition.

After the game, the experience continues at more bars around Wrigleyville. The Cubby Bear is the traditional post-game watering hole.

There’s one modern thing to keep in mind before going to Wrigley Field: plan ahead.

The Cubs are actually good this year so tickets are difficult to find, especially on game days. (If you decide to go on a whim, start your ticket search at Murphy’s Bleachers.) The fans are also a bit more serious about the outcome of the games than throughout much of the team’s history. It seems ironic, but Wrigley Field is actually more fun when the team is the lovable Cubbies rather than a World Series contender. You can’t really blame them, though; the Cubs haven’t been to the Fall Classic since 1945 and haven’t won one since 1908.

Wrigley Field and the whole experience is at its best for sunny Saturday day games.

 

FENWAY PARK (BOSTON RED SOX)

fenway park
Fenway Park | Image via Pixabay under license CC0

Fenway Park is even older than Wrigley Field; in fact, it’s the oldest ballpark in America. It opened in 1912, just four years after Jack Norworth wrote “Take Me Out to the Ballgame.” To put that in perspective, when Fenway was built, there were only eight teams in the American League. Today, there are 15.

The old red brick building is highlighted by a huge 37-foot tall wall in left field known as the “Green Monster.”  Along the rightfield line is “Pesky’s Pole,” named for former player, manager and Red Sox legend Johnny Pesky. Metal beams that block the views from some seats and support the upper deck make you realize you’re in the same place where the greatest Red Sox legends played: Ted Williams, Jimmie Foxx, Jim Lonborg, Fred Lynn, Yaz, David Ortiz… even Bill “Spaceman” Lee.

Like Wrigley Field, you just don’t show up to Fenway Park in time to catch the first pitch. Here, the scene is outside the stadium on Yawkey Way. There’s an old-time band, a guy on stilts playing catch with kids and dozens of vendors grilling up sausages, dogs, cheesesteaks and even Cuban sandwiches, a Fenway tradition served up by former pinwheeling pitcher Luis Taint, who is from Cuba. I recommend, however, the Italian sausages.

fenway park
Courtesy of the Greater Boston Convention & Visitors Bureau Convention & Visitors Bureau

The only catch is that a few years ago, the Red Sox made Yawkey Way an actual part of Fenway Park, so you need a ticket to get to it, and there’s no in-and-out privileges, which is kind of a bummer.

As for bars before the game, there’s the Cask ‘n Flagon. After the game, it’s back to the Clask ‘n Flagon and/or Jillian’s, a huge billiards lounge.

Inside Fenway, it’s all about soaking up the scene and the history. Walk around the old concourses, check out different vantage points and perhaps even have some “chow-da.”

You’ll also be surrounded by Red Sox fans, which is an experience all unto itself. Things have changed a bit since the team has won the World Series a couple of times lately; but the fans – while being quite knowledgeable about the game, their players and even the other team’s players – have an inherited sense of impending doom about them, so listening to their clever criticisms is one of the highlights of going to Fenway. Part of this is perhaps understandable – Fenway was opened the same week the Titanic crashed into the iceberg.

You can easily get to Fenway Park from downtown by using the Green Line of the “T”, the Metro subway. Trains B, C and D go to Fenway; just follow the crowds to get to the stadium. Doing this with other Red Sox fans will really help get you in the mood for the entire Fenway experience.

Fenway Park
Fenway Park – the 94-year-old park is home to the 2004 World Series Champions, the Boston Red Sox | Courtesy of the Greater Boston Convention & Visitors Bureau Convention & Visitors Bureau

It is interesting to note, by the way, that a 16-ounce beer at Fenway and Wrigley will set you back about 8 bucks, which is the most expensive ballpark beer in baseball. There’s a price – in beer, anyway – to pay for all that history.

 

AT&T PARK (SAN FRANCISCO GIANTS)

att park san francisco
AT&T Park Baseball Stadium in San Francisco. Home of the San Francisco Giants professional baseball team.

San Francisco’s AT&T Park does not have the tradition of Wrigley or Fenway, but the city does have an interesting history with its baseball stadiums. At the old Candlestick Park – which was located on a very breezy part of the bay – a pitcher was once literally blown off the mound in gusty winds during an All-Star game.

The current ballpark is also located on the water, but in a much calmer location. It’s also more convenient, just a streetcar ride from the Ferry Building.

And it’s brick, giving it the appearance of an old-fashioned ballpark. You can do something here that traces back to the early days of baseball, something that’s not even available at Wrigley or Fenway, and that is to watch part of the game without having a ticket. In a nod back to when boys would peek through a hole in the outfield fence, you can stand behind the rightfield wall and look through a gate. (Just don’t linger.) While you’re quite a distance from home plate, and also at ground level, you can’t really see much of the action, but you are close enough to the opposing rightfielder to tease him in the good ol’ baseball tradition of heckling.

Another interesting activity that’s certainly unique to San Francisco is to rent a kayak and join the dozen or so others who sit in the bay just outside the stadium in hopes that a home run ball will drop in the water around them. When that does happen, it’s a mad scramble of people paddling to get to the ball. This area is known as McCovey Cove, named after the big-swinging first baseman of the 1970s, Willie McCovey.

mccovey cove san francisco giants
McCovey Cove by AT&T park in San Francisco during the Home Run Derby filled with rafters hopeful to grab a homerun ball July 9, 2007

You should also be familiar with Willie Mays, the franchise’s greatest player. He finished his career with a whopping 660 home runs, a lofty accomplishment to say the least, considering he played most of his games in windy Candlestick Park. There is a statue of him in front of the stadium, and the stadium’s address is Mays’ name and number: 24 Willie Mays Plaza.

To get the full San Francisco Giants game-day experience, you need first to go to MoMo’s, the upscale-ish restaurant and bar across the street. Most people hang out and socialize on the patio, and some of those people are actually going to the game. (San Franciscans, at least the single ones, like to go to bars around events where they can mingle.)

Inside AT&T Park, it’s like being in a new and clean, old-fashioned ballpark. Its signature symbols are a giant coke bottle that lights up when the Giants hit a home run and a huge old-fashioned baseball glove in left-center field.

san francisco giants att park
Rangers players taking balls in the outfield during batting practice game 2 of the 2010 World Series game between Giants and Rangers Oct. 28, 2010 AT&T Park San Francisco, CA.

San Francisco used to have a dancing crab as a mascot (yes, a dancing crab!) that was so hated fans pelted it with peanuts and whatever else they could get their hands on when it came out between innings. Now, they use their hands to clap a lot because their beloved Giants have won the World Series three times since 2010, most recently in 2014.

 

PETCO PARK (SAN DIEGO PADRES)

petco park
Image via Pixabay under license CC0

In San Diego, the team is so bad fans don’t have to bother themselves with the pesky problem of worrying about winning games, so they just go to Petco Park and enjoy a good time.

They’ve got the place to do it before games, too, in the sensational Gaslamp Quarter.

gaslamp quarter san diego

All you really have to do is walk around and stop in a place that looks inviting, but here’s a few suggestions. Barleymash is the most popular casual bar in the Gaslamp; but careful here: you may get so comfortable you’ll forget about the game! The Tin Fish has people relaxing out on a good-sized patio having pre-game food and beers; this is a very shorts-casual spot. The Tilted Kilt features eye-popping bartenders and waitresses. Bubs At The Ballpark is your beer-drinking bar by the stadium.

If you want to watch the game from the ultimate luxury box – for free admission – then go to the Altitude Sky Lounge on the rooftop of the Marriott. Actually, you’re so high up and far away it’s more like peeking inside the stadium and you can’t really see what’s happening, but it’s a pretty cool perspective from this lounge-style bar.

The stadium itself is a beauty and is as relaxed as the people in San Diego. There’s a grassy area beyond the outfield where you can sit down and have a picnic while occasionally peeking in at whatever might be happening on the field.

petco park san diego

Heck, forget the game; here, it’s fun just to walk around inside the stadium. There are outside bars and food places where you can look down on San Diego Bay. There’s a huge model of an aircraft carrier, the USS Midway; the real thing sits just beyond Petco Park and is open for tours. Another hallway provides a history of baseball in San Diego. For those who arrive early enough, you can take in batting practice at a place called “The Beach.”

And then win or lose, it’s back to the Gaslamp where the real game begins for the single people.

 

BUSCH STADIUM (ST. LOUIS CARDINALS)

st louis busch stadium
Image via Pixabay under license CC0

This is the place to go to be around people who are passionate about baseball. Cardinals fans appreciate the history of the game, the slow beauty of it and have great respect for its traditions.

You can immediately earn acceptance of the fans – and quite possibly a beer – by saying you’ve always been a big fan of Stan Musial. It was Musial who was the greatest, most popular player in Cardinals history. A few other names to know are Ozzie Smith (perhaps the game’s greatest defensive shortstop), Bob Gibson and Albert Pujols, but only when he was with the Cardinals, of course. (He’s now with the Anaheim Angels.)

The Cardinals play in Busch Stadium, one of the best venues in baseball. Because of this, you’ll want to spend much of your time in it, rather than seeking out a lengthy pre-game scene, as is the case with the other stadiums featured in this article.  Try and get a ticket behind home plate – from here you get a spectacular view of the St. Louis skyline and the famous Gateway Arch.

St Louis, architecture, Ballpark Village Missouri,USA.
View along Clark Avenue Saint Louis Ballpark Village adjacent to Busch Stadium, home to St. Louis Cardinals in downtown St. Louis, Missouri, USA.

However, you must carve out pre-game time at Ballpark Village, which has several restaurants and bars, among them Cardinal Nation, which houses the Cardinals Hall of Fame (a must) and rooftop seating with views inside the stadium.

After the game, head to the Soulard section of St. Louis. This is home of the St. Louis blues, and you can hear live bands in several small bars. The Great Grizzly Bear is where locals like to take visitors. Venice Café is a funky hang-out joint with a big outdoor patio and music inside; this is best for the younger and singles set. If you want go-to places within walking distance of Busch Stadium, there are several bars along the river at Laclede’s Landing.

While in St. Louis, be sure and have its signature food dish, toasted ravioli. This is ravioli that – according to legend – was dropped into oil instead of water at a place called Mama’s On The Hill back in the 40s. The restaurant still exists and The Hill is the place to get the best Italian food in St. Louis.