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Relationship Journals: A Quick How-To

It finally happened. You met the perfect partner and they just so happen to feel the same way about you. You dated for a while, DTR-ed, and now you’re living in a blissful state of happiness together. Job done, right? Wrong. Contrary to popular belief, real relationships take work. That’s where relationship journals come in. Keeping track of where you and your partner are at and how you feel is essential. Luckily, we have just the thing to help you along the way. Here’s how to journal for your relationship.

Create a Daily To-Do List

Let’s be real. We all know healthy relationships are built on trust, love, and mutual respect. And yet, when you’re stressed out, tired, or blue, you may forget to express these things. Well, you can use a relationship journal to do the hard work for you. Simply create a daily to-do list of ways you can show your partner you care.

For example, you could create a target to cuddle your partner or make time to hear about their workday. Every little bit helps. In fact, a recent study from Penn State University found gestures such as hugs and random acts of kindness are the real way to people’s hearts. Americans put these small things at the top of their lists when it came to what made them feel loved and appreciated. Go ahead and do them!

relationship journals

Note What You Appreciate About Them

Do you appreciate your partner and the quality of your relationship? If you’ve been in a long-term relationship for years, you may have forgotten just how good you have it. Each week, use your journal to note down the things you truly love about that special someone and all they do for you. There are likely hundreds of gestures that have slipped under your radar.

Remember, nothing is too small to appreciate. If your partner cooked you dinner, did the dishes, or just remembered to pick up milk after work, write it down. This act will remind you your partner always has your back and helps you out. Appreciation is a deep form of true love.

Write Down Any Issues You Have

Real life is not a romance novel. Every relationship has its challenges and that’s perfectly okay. What matters is how you approach these issues and what you do about them. Ignoring the flaws or problems you come across will only mean they get worse and worse over time.

Rather than carelessly sweeping these issues under the rug, write them in your journal and rate how you feel about them. You could create an emotional rating system of one to five – one being the least impactful and five being the most. If a problem is consistently getting fours and fives on your scale, it may be time to have an honest, open conversation about it. Communication is key, and relationship journals can help with this.

writing in a relationship journal

Set Long-Term Couple Goals

Where do you see this relationship going? What are your hopes for the future? These may be things you have never sat down and discussed with your partner, but you should. The last thing you want is for your relationship to stall and stagnate! Deciding on some long-term goals for the two of you is a smart way to keep things moving forward.

Talk about how you visualize the future and make it happen. Perhaps you want to go on a month-long trip together. Perhaps you’d like to buy your first home or plan a wedding. These dreams are valid, but they’re only going to happen if you take steps toward them.

Then Break Them Down Into Targets

Reaching these goals won’t happen overnight. To help you get there, break them down into small, manageable targets. For example, if your goal is to buy a home together, you could create a monthly budget to help you save for a down payment. If you want to go on a once-in-a-lifetime trip, set small tasks that will help you plan it. Simple.

Experiment a Little With Your Journal

Needless to say, the bond you have with your partner is completely unique and you may find you need different things from the journaling experience. You have complete control here. Feel free to create sections of your own design and try new things. Just as every relationship is different, our relationship journals can be too. So, why wait? Get journaling today.