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8 Empowering Resolutions We All Need to Make for Next Year

The countdown has begun and we’re well on our way to leaving 2017 in the dust. Yes, the new year is nigh, which, as the tradition goes, means it’s time to reflect and make some changes. So, how are you going to make your New Year’s resolutions count this time around? For a little inspiration, here are eight empowering resolutions to try in 2018.

1. Stop Saying Negative Things

Negativity is like a virus. Once you let it into your life, it will spread. It taints everything – even the good things – with a tinge of glum gray. To make matters worse, there’s a whole load of research suggesting negative talk is bad for your health.

While you may think talking about your woes is helping you deal with them, it’s not. It’s time for some cold, hard truth here. Indulging in negativity is like binge-eating a ton of chocolate: it may feel good at the time, but it will make you seriously sick.

2. Break Your Gossiping Habit

“Obviously, don’t say anything but….” No. Stop it. Close your lips before you do it again. It’s not worth the hassle. If you’re a chronic gossip, it’s time to change your ways. As 2018 dawns, promise yourself that you will break this nasty little habit once and for all.

Concerning yourself with other people’s business and talking about them in hushed tones by the water cooler will do you no good. Either they will find out and see you in a whole new light or they won’t; either way, it makes you a pretty terrible friend and an even worse confidant.

3. Keep a Daily Wellness Journal

writing in a journal

I’m not talking about the type of journal where you write your crush’s name and draw a thousand hearts around it. (Unless, of course, you want to start one like that, in which case – go right ahead!) I’m talking about a wellness journal, i.e. an account of how you are both mentally and physically on a day-to-day basis.

The act of writing down your stresses, feelings, and health levels can not only boost your immune system, but also help you manage your emotions, according to research from the American Psychological Association. So, if you’re the type of person who experiences a roller coaster’s worth of moods at times, this could well help you ride it.

4. Give Your Friends a Confidence Boost

When was the last time you gave your bestie a genuine compliment? All too often, we get so wrapped up in our own lives that we forget to praise those around us. Your closest friends take that role in your life for a reason. They are worthy of your commendation.

What’s more, the odd “You are so darn productive today” or “I love how thoughtful you are” can go a long way. Not everyone wears their heart on their sleeve. Your friends may seem fine and dandy on the surface, but they could be in dire need of a little pick-me-up beneath. Be the one to give it them.

5. Get Fit and Healthy, Not Just Slim

If you’ve already jotted down “get skinny” on your resolution list, it’s time to take a long, figurative look in the mirror. Consider why you feel this way. Do you want to look a certain way? Do you feel pressure to conform to someone else’s idea of what makes you beautiful? In truth, the most likely route for your urge to shed pounds comes from a place of negativity.

staying fit

Let’s flip this resolution on its head. Instead of wanting to slim down, aim to boost your health and fitness. Only 51.7% of the US population follows the Physical Activity Guidelines for aerobic physical activity, according to the National Center for Health Statistics. That means that nearly half of us are not as fit as we should be. It’s time to change that. Start small and build your fitness levels up for the best results.

6. Learn How to Say No

You already know how to say it; but despite this, it’s a word many of us don’t use often enough. People-pleasers (that could be you!) agree to all kinds of things – from dinner parties to babysitting – that they have zero interest in doing. If that sounds familiar, do yourself a favor and start standing your ground. Saying you don’t want to do something is not selfish, rude, or mean. It’s the right thing to do. You’ll save yourself a whole load of hassle by being direct and honest from the get-go. Plus, you won’t have to do things you hate. Bonus.

7. Quit Comparing Yourself to Others

As the late, great Hemingway once allegedly said, “There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.” While there’s an undeniable amount of truth here, many of us can’t help comparing ourselves to others. Plus, in the era of social media, this naughty little sin can be more damaging than ever before. According to a recent study by the University of Houston, comparing your life to that of your online friends can lead to “long-term destructive emotions” and, in some cases, depression. While quitting this habit may be harder than most, it’s worth the trouble.

8. Let Go of Your Regrets

As you lie in bed at night, the scene replays again and again in your mind. You keep thinking of the words you should have said or the things you should have done. Here’s a quick piece of advice that you really need: Let. It. Go.

happy woman

Living with regrets is not only painful, but it can also have a negative impact on your physical health. Research from Concordia University found that having regrets and feeling unable to let them go led to a “biological dysregulation of the hormone and immune systems.” A new year offers a clean slate. For the sake of your health, wave goodbye to your past. For good.

How to Set Resolutions You’ll Actually Keep

We spend the last part of any given year eating too much sugar, listening to countdowns, and reading best-of lists. We spend the first part of a new year thinking ahead to a lofty, ambiguous future, setting unattainable goals, and hoping for the best. And somewhere in this make-believe world is where we spend time setting New Year’s resolutions.

Reality check, anyone?

Laura Vanderkam has one for you. She’s a time management expert who has studied the habits of busy people and written a number of books about it, including her most recent, I Know How She Does It: How Successful Women Make the Most of Their Time. And through the research for this book, she discovered just how elastic our schedules can really be.

“‘I don’t have time,’ often means ‘It’s not a priority,’” said Laura during a Ted Talk she gave this October. “Using this language reminds us that time is a choice.”

Since so much about keeping New Year’s resolutions comes down to choosing how our time will be spent throughout the subsequent year, we have a lot to learn from Vanderkam’s research. But it’s one thing to decide to prioritize our time, and another to actually do it. How do you ensure that you follow through on your New Year’s Resolutions this year? Again, it’s pretty simple, according to Vanderkam.

how to set resolutions you'll actually keep

1. Give Your Future Self a Performance Review

Capitalizing on that reflective tendency brought on by the passage of another year on this planet, we’re tempted to treat the New Year as a time to give ourselves a performance review, like a boss would. And while this is also helpful, says Vanderkam, what if we were to look ahead to the next year, and give ourselves a performance review for the year ahead — before it even happens?

That’s right: Vanderkam wants you to think ahead to the next New Year and congratulate yourself on your future accomplishments. You know those holiday letters? Think about the one you’ll be able to write next year.

“Please, don’t send it,” adds Vanderkam, clarifying with a chuckle. “But you can write it. And now, between the performance review and the family holiday letter, we have a list of six to ten goals we can work on in the next year.”

2. Break Those Goals Down Into Steps

Maybe it’s that you’ve envisioned telling others about your accomplishments, or that you’ve thought more realistically about what you can actually accomplish in the coming year, but Vanderkam’s idea about looking back on your future seems to result in a list of much more attainable goals. The rest should be easy: You just have to make your goals happen in the time you have.

Every goal can be broken down into steps. This is something you’re probably already doing, but consider this a helpful reminder. For example, if you’re going to save money to go on an amazing trip this year, you need to create a budget, cut out some expenses, plan time off, plan the travel, etc. And each week, you need to think about how you’ll fit these steps into your life before you hit the ground running.

How about looking ahead to the next week each Friday afternoon? You’re often tired and aren’t going to spend time actively working on your goals, but you’re willing to think about them. “So take a little bit of time Friday afternoon, and make yourself a three-category priority list: career, relationships, self.” Then, take that list and plug it into your schedule.

3. Actually Take These Steps, One at a Time

Does anyone else do that thing where you make goals, plan the steps, and then try to do them all at once? This last tip isn’t part of Laura Vanderkam’s amazing Ted Talk (which you should absolutely take 12 minutes to listen to or watch), but I thought it worth adding, anyway.

Friendly reminder: you can’t do everything at once. And if you’re anything like me, you’ll want to. Which is extremely overwhelming. It’s hard when you’re ambitious and you want it all; trust me, I get that. But we’re all guilty of planning a post-New Year routine that is so stringent, it doesn’t make it past the third week of January.

So this year, be more realistic. Take each step as it comes, and don’t try to skip ahead. You may find that you even enjoy the process.

Weekend Winter Getaways to the Caribbean

The sun-kissed latitudes of the tropics may seem further and further away as the winter days get darker and colder, but in our shrinking world a sunny weekend getaway is never as far as you think.

Most of us weather the winter months believing that a quick rejuvenating jaunt somewhere warm is too distant, too expensive, or just plain out of reach. This was probably true even just five years ago; but in the meantime we’ve transitioned into a new era of travel, in which we’re all walking around with a pocketful of travel-hacking apps, and dramatically dropping airfares implore us to board a plane and soak up the sun stat.

If the thought of a romantic winter getaway gives you the chills, turn your wanderlusting gaze south to look at the Caribbean.

For under $300 round-trip, you can get from most major US airports to the Caribbean and back. You can go budget backpacker style, sleeping in a hostel and grazing on street food while you wander the streets of a new destination, or you can use the extra room in your budget to splurge on the star treatment.

However you spend your winter escape, try it out in one of these four affordable, easily reachable, and gloriously tropical Caribbean destinations.

Cancun

cancun

Mexico’s Yucatan Peninsula sort of reaches out into the Gulf towards Florida, and if you look hard enough and squint, it’s almost like Mexico is curling its index finger in a “come here” gesture inviting you down for a weekend out of the snow.

A classic destination for American winterbirds, Cancun is easily reachable, reasonably priced, and most importantly, never runs out of sunshine. Get packed for your beach vacation and spend a long weekend lounging on Playa Delfines near the Iberostar Cancun resort, or pop down to Playa del Carmen and set up shop at one of the dozens of hostels within walking distance of the sand. If you’ve got a roomier schedule, make an adventurous day trip down to the Mayan ruins at Tulum.

Cheapest departure airports: Miami, Dallas, Detroit, NYC, Chicago

Low-cost carriers with service to Cancun: Jetblue, Frontier, Spirit, Virgin America, Southwest

Havana

winter weekend getaways

Once illegal for US citizens, travel to Cuba sailed past off-the-beaten-path hipster destination and almost immediately exploded into the travel mainstream in the last couple of years. And at just over 200 miles from Miami, it’s one of the closest and most inviting places to spend a weekend thawing out and stocking up on some much-needed vitamin D.

The Cuban capital of Havana has become exceedingly easy to reach by plane or cruise in recent years, but there’s also more to the Caribbean’s largest island than the tourist districts of historic Havana Vieja. Treat yourself to a café cubano upon arrival and then shove on to the best beaches in Baracoa or Varadero. Once you’ve seen enough of the main island, take a boat across the narrow straits to idyllic Isla de Juventud, where you can go diving or keep it simple sipping cocktails in your lounge chair.

Cheapest departure airports: Miami, Orlando, NYC, Boston

Low-cost carriers with service to Havana: Jetblue, Spirit, Frontier

Cartagena

weekend winter getaways

Far from the street art of Bogotá, Cartagena is Colombia’s vivid and vibrant tourist outpost on the Caribbean; and despite being all the way on the other side of the sea, it’s one of December’s cheapest sunny getaways.

Spend your days walking under nonstop sunshine, walking between and upon the city walls and taking in the Spanish colonial architecture of the historic city center. You can walk up the Bocagrande peninsula to catch some rays by the beach, but the better choice is an hour south on Playa Blanca, where a couple dollars will rent you an overnight hammock just steps away from the aquamarine waves rushing up out of the Caribbean Sea.

Cheapest departure airports: Tampa, Orlando, Miami, Atlanta, NYC

Low-cost carriers with service to Cartagena: Spirit, Avianca, Jetblue

The Florida Keys

weekend winter getaways

Sometimes the depth of winter makes you feel like you’re stuck in a frigid world somewhere far from the center of the solar system, but actually you don’t even have to leave the country to feel the heat of the sun again.

The Florida Keys are home to some of the best beaches in the Sunshine State. You can fly into Key West and spend your weekend flip-flopping around the historic district under the shade of palm trees, or visit any of the quieter yet oh-so-splendidly-sunny keys leading back up to Miami. Islamorada and Key Largo are popular among Floridians, but all that really matters is that you enjoy fresh conch fritters and a proper key lime pie while you’re there.

You’ll be able to fly into Key West from New Orleans, Charleston, and Atlanta, as well as other major Florida airports, for around $300 round trip; but you’ll do better by finding a cheap flight to Miami from anywhere in the country and busing or boating the rest of the way.

You can reach either Key West or Miami at a reasonable price from most major US cities and carriers.